Speed's widow has new love after saying she 'doesn't know' if she can forgive

Gary Speed's widow, Louise, has managed to find love once again having struggled with loneliness following the tragic death of the former Wales manager.

Last month marked the 10-year anniversary of Speed's passing after he took his own life.

It left Louise alone and with two boys to look after during a period where she has confessed she "struggled to get off the sofa" and admits she "doesn't know" whether she can forgive the former Newcastle and Leeds star despite her desire to.

Now though she has found love in Quinton Bird, a 52-year-old divorced father of three.

Louise and her partner have been in business together for the past six years as the only directors of a successful property development company based in Chester.

She recently opened up on her immediate feelings after Speed's death but has now learnt that "time is a healer".

Louise told the Daily Mail : "It was like being in the worst nightmare possible. There were no answers and no Gary walking through the door again. Nothing was ever going to be right again.

"I was trudging through life, just functioning. If I could have been anybody else apart from me, for a long time, I would have happily taken it.

"But we are 10 years on now. It's a cliché but time is a healer even if it takes years. I have learned that life can be good again, can be great again."

Bird has shared several pictures of himself and Louise on social media, showing them on holiday as well as hiking.

The widow admits to being a different person following the experience and is determined to "protect herself from life".

Louise added: "I don't think you move on from something like this as the same person. I have become wiser. I am probably more confident than I was.

"But I tend to wear a body of armour around me the whole time, if I am honest — so that I cannot be hurt again. I know as we go through life different things hit us and I actually think that I deal with things OK now. Nothing fazes me or scares me anymore.

"I don't know if that body of armour has developed over time or whether I deliberately put it on at some point. All I know is that it is there now and it wasn't 10 years ago.

"I just want to protect myself from life. I don't want to feel or go through anything like that ever again. I hope that makes sense."

Speed appeared on BBC's Football Focus the day before he took his own life, which caused distress to many who admit they've been left wondering whether they missed any signs.

The Welshman began his career as a teenager at Leeds during the late 1980s.

Louise has revealed that she came across a letter from Speed that was never sent expressing suicidal thoughts at 17 years old.

"That letter was never sent," she said. "That was the first I knew of it. But my conclusion is that to do what Gary did you must be unwell in your mind. He couldn't talk, didn't want to talk. He had all the opportunity through people like the League Managers Association."