Two years on from England conquering the continent, the Lionesses were a shadow of that team from 2022 as Giulia Gwinn (2) and Klara Buhl propelled the merciless visitors into a three-goal advantage.
Georgia Stanway's own double capped off a frenzied five-goal first half, but England were then left to rue a controversial penalty decision in the second half, as Sara Dabritz stroked home from 12 yards before Lucy Bronze's additional consolation.
The England fans that rocked up to last month's men's Nations League loss to Greece did not exactly get their money's worth, but Friday's crowd witnessed surely one of the most entertaining first halves that the new Wembley has ever seen.
Germany sparked a mad goal rush in the English capital, benefitting from non-existent Lionesses defending to storm into a sensational three-goal lead through Gwinn's double and Buhl's ferocious strike.
However, as atrocious as the hosts were at the back, staunch rearguard action was in short supply for the visitors too, and the Lionesses faithful found their voice again when Stanway's quickfire brace brought Sarina Wiegman's team right back into the captivating contest.
Goalmouth action was not in short supply in the second half either, despite the lack of rippling nets, but England's muddled defence came to the fore again before Dabritz converted a highly controversial penalty.
Bronze quickly notched the hosts' third thanks to a goalkeeping gaffe, but Wiegman's side were ultimately left to lament their pitiful defensive performance as their mixed set of results in 2024 continues.
ENGLAND VS. GERMANY HIGHLIGHTS
Giulia Gwinn goal vs. England (4th min, England 0-1 Germany)
A nightmare start for the European champions. Leah Williamson's lackadaisical backpass puts Millie Bright in all sorts of trouble, and the Chelsea defender nudges Linda Dallmann in the back as she charges through on goal.
The referee immediately points to the spot, and despite the best efforts of Hannah Hampton - who dives the right way - Gwinn's penalty is perfectly-placed into the bottom right corner.
Giulia Gwinn goal vs. England (11th min, England 0-2 Germany)
England are at sixes and sevens at the back, and a ruthless Germany double their lead in no time.
Buhl leads a counter charge and picks out the run of Gwinn with a phenomenal cross-field ball, and the right-back has the freedom of the right-hand side thanks to Jess Carter being dragged into the centre.
Gwinn's touch is slightly heavy, but she still manages to beat Carter to the ball and unleash a low strike, which clips the inside of the far post before nestling into the back of the net.
Klara Buhl goal vs. England (29th min, England 0-3 Germany)
The lethargic Lionesses are being totally outplayed on their own patch! Again, Wiegman's team are caught cold on the counter-attack, as Buhl squares up to Bronze after a fabulous pass from Giovanna Hoffmann.
The 23-year-old cuts inside and lets fly with a fierce low strike, which has too much venom for Hampton to keep out at her near post - could the Chelsea goalkeeper have done better?
Georgia Stanway goal vs. Germany (33rd min, England 1-3 Germany)
The start of a barnstorming fightback? Gwinn has been through all the emotions in this first half, as Germany's double scorer concedes a penalty for stopping Lauren Hemp's cross with her outstretched hand.
Stanway steps up to the spot and ruthlessly finds the bottom corner. Wiegman urges her team back to the centre circle - she can sense something special brewing!
Georgia Stanway goal vs. Germany (36th min, England 2-3 Germany)
Has Wembley Stadium ever seen a more enthralling first half of football? England are right back in the contest as Germany take a leaf out of the Lionesses' defending book!
The visitors leave their right flank exposed and are punished for it - Alessia Russo sets Beth Mead away, and the Arsenal forward unselfishly squares for Stanway to crash home her second of the match. Breathless!
Sara Dabritz goal vs. England (72nd min, England 2-4 Germany)
Well well well. Germany felt hard done by when England were awarded their first-half penalty, but the shoe is on the other foot this time around.
It all starts from Hampton fumbling a free kick, and an episode of penalty-box pinball ends with Russo and Pia-Sophie Wolter both going for the same ball and both going in agony after their feet clatter into each other.
The referee does not hesitate to point to the spot, but replays show that Russo was in fact the one who was kicked by Wolter. Nevertheless, the call stands, and Dabritz buries her spot kick to restore a comfortable lead for the visitors.
Lucy Bronze goal vs. Germany (81st min, England 3-4 Germany)
Calamity after calamity! England cut the deficit in half straight away as Ann-Katrin Berger spills Lauren Hemp's free kick, giving Bronze an empty net to poke home into. Still hope for the hosts!
PLAYER OF THE MATCH - GEORGIA STANWAY
Doing her best to bring a measure of control to a disjointed England side, Georgia Stanway almost triggered a wonderful Lionesses turnaround with an emphatic penalty and brilliant run into the box before crashing in her second of the night.
The Bayern Munich midfielder also impressed defensively against a few of her teammates, making four interceptions and two tackles, even if they were in vain in the end.
ENGLAND VS. GERMANY MATCH STATS
Possession: England 51%-49% Germany
Shots: England 9-12 Germany
Shots on target: England 4-8 Germany
Corners: England 6-7 Germany
Fouls: England 9-9 Germany
BEST STATS
WHAT NEXT?
After both sides have caught their breath, England host South Africa at the Coventry Building Society Arena on Tuesday evening, while Germany - who also need to brush up on their defending - take on Australia in Duisburg on Monday.